1
00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:07,280
? Luxury comedy

2
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,440
? Ooh yeah

3
00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:22,160
? La la la-la-la-la la

4
00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:25,000
? People running down,
people making love

5
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:27,760
? La la la-la-la-la la

6
00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:30,440
? People in the night,
people up above

7
00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:33,480
? Ooh yeah

8
00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:37,920
? Luxury comedy

9
00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:39,600
? Ooh yeah

10
00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:46,440
'Come on, man!'

11
00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:49,240
MUSIC: HEAVY DRUM INTRO

12
00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:51,480
? Yeah, come on!

13
00:00:51,480 --> 00:00:54,000
? I'm crawling up the road,
I'm licking up the toad

14
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:58,240
? Got a Japanese dream boy
living in my eyeball

15
00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:00,400
? Crawling up the road,
eating up the toad

16
00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:03,920
? Licking up the road
with the Japanese dream boy... ?

17
00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:05,360
Who's this?

18
00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:06,560
Lysergic Casserole.

19
00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:07,680
Best band ever.

20
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:08,800
Never heard of them.

21
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,680
No-one ever has, that's the problem.

22
00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:15,360
Made one blinding album in the '60s
then disappeared. It all went wrong.

23
00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:16,520
What do you mean?

24
00:01:16,520 --> 00:01:19,400
Well, it was the '60s.
A lot of drugs kicking around.

25
00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:23,400
They took so much LSD they got
trapped in their own guitar case.

26
00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:24,520
Really?

27
00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:27,600
Yeah! I've got it here, actually.
I bought it on eBay.

28
00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:32,560
Look, they're still in here!

29
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,240
I'm so hungry, man!

30
00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:37,120
Can't we stop at
Poppa Yod's old food cafe?

31
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,280
I really need a beanburger, man.

32
00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,360
Are you out of your mind, Charlie?

33
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,240
That's my raison d'etre, man.

34
00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:47,200
Poppa Yod's the reason we're in
this mess in the first place, man.

35
00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:51,320
Everyone knows he's using sheets
of acid instead of cheese, man.

36
00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:54,120
What'd you have to order
double Swiss for, Charlie?

37
00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,960
Oh God, Charlie, man,
I can't feel my own hands!

38
00:01:57,960 --> 00:01:59,200
I'm sorry, man!

39
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:00,720
(COYOTE HOWLS)

40
00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,200
My shins are made of doo-wop music!

41
00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:05,880
Look! There's Orson Welles!

42
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,800
Do you know what? I quite fancy
a beanburger from Poppa Yod's.

43
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:18,120
Can you nip out and get me one?

44
00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:19,360
It's in California.

45
00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:21,720
If you can't be bothered,
I'll have a sandwich.

46
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:22,480
What do you want in it?

47
00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:23,640
Folk music.

48
00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,280
And make sure it's toasted.

49
00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:27,680
? ..Eyeball seesaw. ?

50
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:33,160
Lysergic Casserole. The '60s.

51
00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,840
I remember I worked with
Jim Morrison in the '60s

52
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:39,480
and he insisted that everyone he
worked with had leather trousers on.

53
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:41,640
Obviously, I haven't got legs, so

54
00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:43,640
he whipped out a sewing machine

55
00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:48,080
and designed a large flat black
leather pocket for me to sit in

56
00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,800
and, um, I produced
the albums from there.

57
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:55,080
Like a sort of Nazi kangaroo pouch.

58
00:02:57,440 --> 00:02:59,200
? They call me Diamondback

59
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:03,360
? Yeah, they call me Diamondback

60
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,840
? My father was a pet shop junkie

61
00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:11,600
? My mother had 100 eyes

62
00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:13,880
? My mother had 100 eyes

63
00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:15,040
(RATTLES)

64
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:19,320
? I crawled out of a swamp in Putney

65
00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,920
? I'm my own percussion,
that's my surprise (RATTLES)

66
00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:24,280
? That's my surprise

67
00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,440
(RATTLES)

68
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,240
? They call me Diamondback

69
00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:32,120
? Yeah, Diamondback

70
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:33,760
(RATTLES)

71
00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:35,600
? Oh, call me Diamondback

72
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,800
? Yeah, I'm Diamondback

73
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,800
(RATTLES)

74
00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,960
BIRDS TWEET

75
00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:52,880
What are you doing?

76
00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:56,560
I can't bear it any more. Lysergic
Casserole are my favourite band.

77
00:03:56,560 --> 00:04:00,320
I can't watch them going round
and round inside their own minds.

78
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:03,160
I've built a ramp out of Ryvita.
I'm going to set them free.

79
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:04,400
Think they'll be all right?

80
00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:05,560
Yeah! What do you mean?

81
00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:09,320
They are from the '60s. The world's
changed and they're on a lot of acid.

82
00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,560
I know, but imagine if they get out.

83
00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:14,800
They might make a second album.
I could be their manager.

84
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,680
I never had a job before.

85
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:20,240
All right, boys, you've got to get
out of here, cos I need a job.

86
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:22,640
Go on, boys! you can make it happen.

87
00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:25,560
Hey, look, man. It's a miracle!

88
00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:29,520
It's a ramp made out of Ryvita!
We are home free, brother!

89
00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:34,640
I swear I saw the hand of God place
it there himself, Charlie, man!

90
00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:36,160
Hold on, brother!

91
00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:38,040
We are free!

92
00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:40,600
Woo! Hoo-hoo!

93
00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:42,040
WIND RUSHES

94
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:44,160
Man, whose hands are these, Charlie?

95
00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:46,000
Um, mine.

96
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,120
Woo!

97
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,760
Woo-hoo!

98
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:53,920
Oh, man! Aw...

99
00:04:57,440 --> 00:05:01,520
MUSIC FROM VISION ON'S
"GALLERY"

100
00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:19,360
HARD HOUSE MUSIC

101
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,760
"GALLERY" MUSIC

102
00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:24,480
HARD HOUSE MUSIC

103
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,520
"GALLERY" MUSIC

104
00:05:26,520 --> 00:05:28,120
HARD HOUSE MUSIC

105
00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:51,200
PSYCHEDELIC MUSIC

106
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,280
WHIP CRACKS

107
00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:08,680
A foul-mouthed kookaburra slotted
into the top pocket of a wallaby.

108
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:13,400
A wallaby, like a kangaroo
but a different animal entirely.

109
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:16,320
Well done, Noel.

110
00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:18,440
And thank you to
Jeremy Beautifulchest

111
00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:21,760
for the soundscape to
this haunting piece of work.

112
00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:23,840
Let's put it in the gallery.

113
00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:28,400
Along with this portrait
of Andre the Giant

114
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:31,200
sent in by Sam Makepeace,

115
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,040
aged only five years old.

116
00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:35,960
Well done, Sam,

117
00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:38,360
and well done
to Sam's older brother,

118
00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:40,800
who actually did the work.

119
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:44,880
That's right, Sam, we've been
watching you for five years,

120
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:49,760
anticipating the moment when
you would try and cheat the system.

121
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,920
Was it really worth it, Sam?

122
00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:53,640
Was it really worth it?

123
00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:03,440
? I'm going to have some
bug soup tonight... ?

124
00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:06,040
I feel like my skin is really creepy.

125
00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:07,640
GHOSTLY HIGH-PITCHED COOING

126
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,760
Who goes there?

127
00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:16,040
Are you here for my birthday?

128
00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,880
I didn't know anyone would come.

129
00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:21,040
I'm 100 today, you know.

130
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:25,080
(SQUEAKY VOICE) This is the black
milk that the Fewwawi Man bwings.

131
00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:29,960
This is the spit that the
Devil Man siiiings!

132
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:31,680
BOWL SHATTERS

133
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:35,040
Interesting observation.

134
00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,400
Vodka jelly?

135
00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:37,800
Mmm!

136
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,280
Oh, all 20!

137
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,560
You're a thirsty one!

138
00:08:48,560 --> 00:08:51,960
Oh, you're really getting
the party going, aren't you?

139
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,040
Here, try this on.

140
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:58,120
Oh, look.
I've got a tongue just like you.

141
00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:01,320
PARTY WHISTLE BLOWS

142
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,480
(LAUGHS)

143
00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:08,960
I've got an idea.

144
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,600
Let's play a party game!

145
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,040
Yes, you try.

146
00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,280
Eeeeeee!

147
00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:20,520
Oh, yes! Oh, yes, it's wonderful!

148
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:23,400
It's wonderful! Keep doing it!

149
00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:25,200
How about some music?

150
00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:29,080
THROBBING KEYBOARD MUSIC

151
00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:31,360
Yes. These are notes.

152
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:38,640
Oh!

153
00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:41,080
That's a good choice.

154
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,360
It's my birthday and I'm 100!

155
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:46,000
It's my birthday!

156
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:49,120
I'm 100! It's my birthday!

157
00:09:49,120 --> 00:09:50,480
Can you sing?

158
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:53,280
Yeee...

159
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:54,960
Ah-ee ur-day!

160
00:09:57,320 --> 00:09:58,960
Ee-buh-day!

161
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,760
Mappy buh-day!

162
00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:02,640
You have a lovely voice.

163
00:10:02,640 --> 00:10:05,400
Reminds me of a young Edvard Grieg.

164
00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:10,720
? Blow out the candles
and make a wish while you can

165
00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:17,200
? Blow out the candles
and make a wish while you can

166
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:20,640
? It's your birthday

167
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:23,760
? And it's your birthday

168
00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:27,040
? Happy birthday

169
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:30,240
? Happy birthday

170
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,920
? You got a card from your nan

171
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:36,440
? And you opened it up,
there was money inside

172
00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:38,640
? It's a voucher!

173
00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,480
? You got a card from your nan
and you opened it up

174
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,360
? And it had money inside

175
00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:44,840
? It's a voucher!

176
00:10:44,840 --> 00:10:46,560
? Yeah, it had money inside

177
00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:48,080
? It's a voucher!

178
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:49,760
? Yeah, it had money inside

179
00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:51,240
? Whose voucher?

180
00:10:51,240 --> 00:10:54,400
? Happy birthday
Gonna give you the bumps

181
00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,880
? And it's your birthday
I'm gonna give you the bumps

182
00:10:57,880 --> 00:11:00,960
? Happy birthday
I'm gonna give you the bumps

183
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,880
? Now it's your birthday
Gonna give you the bumps

184
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:05,600
? Happy birthday

185
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:07,320
? Gonna give you the bumps

186
00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:08,600
? Yeah, it's your birthday

187
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:10,000
? Gonna give you the bumps

188
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:12,080
? Happy birthday

189
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:13,560
? Gonna give you the bumps

190
00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,440
? Happy birthday

191
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:18,320
? Gonna give you the bumps

192
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:24,840
MAJESTIC CHORAL MUSIC

193
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,160
Oh, no. It's God.

194
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:33,560
Ghost of a Flea, what are you doing?

195
00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:35,200
Sorry.

196
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:37,680
Go and wait in the car.
I'll deal with you later.

197
00:11:37,680 --> 00:11:39,720
Bye.

198
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:41,480
Oh, don't forget your party bag.

199
00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:49,480
William Jessop, stop summoning up
visitors from the other side

200
00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:51,600
and instigating parties with them.

201
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:53,400
But it is my birthday.

202
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,720
Nevertheless,
this won't happen again, will it?

203
00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:57,200
Probably...no.

204
00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,880
Right. I'll be off, then.

205
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:00,200
Would you like a party bag?

206
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,640
Hmm, what's in it?

207
00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:02,960
Cake and a toy.

208
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,320
Cake and a toy?

209
00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:07,960
Hmm, go on, I'll take one. Not for
me, you understand. For Jesus.

210
00:12:09,560 --> 00:12:12,160
Right. I'll be off, then.

211
00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:14,560
Left a typhoon on in India.

212
00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:18,880
What a dick.

213
00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,000
HARD HOUSE MUSIC

214
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:36,920
? Ooh, yeah ?

215
00:12:44,122 --> 00:12:46,282
Noel, can you sign
my holiday form, please?

216
00:12:46,282 --> 00:12:48,042
Yeah, all right.

217
00:12:51,202 --> 00:12:54,562
I am going on holiday
with Picasso and Keith Haring.

218
00:12:54,562 --> 00:12:56,162
Hold on,
who's going to do my cleaning?

219
00:12:56,162 --> 00:12:57,602
My friend will cover for me.

220
00:12:57,602 --> 00:12:58,922
Not wonky Steve!

221
00:12:58,922 --> 00:13:00,402
No, he's still in prison.

222
00:13:00,402 --> 00:13:01,242
Who, then?

223
00:13:01,242 --> 00:13:03,402
Frida Kahlo,
the surrealist painter.

224
00:13:03,402 --> 00:13:05,282
No way! I love her staff.

225
00:13:05,282 --> 00:13:06,722
She's amazing.

226
00:13:06,722 --> 00:13:07,762
Mm.

227
00:13:07,762 --> 00:13:08,322
Where are you going?

228
00:13:08,322 --> 00:13:09,162
Center Parcs.

229
00:13:09,162 --> 00:13:10,002
Well, send me a postcard, yes?

230
00:13:10,002 --> 00:13:11,282
Yes.

231
00:13:11,282 --> 00:13:13,202
I will need some spending money.

232
00:13:13,202 --> 00:13:14,682
Oh, right, yeah.

233
00:13:17,562 --> 00:13:18,722
Is that enough?

234
00:13:18,722 --> 00:13:19,842
A little more, maybe.

235
00:13:19,842 --> 00:13:23,442
Wait a minute, didn't I already
pay you about two days ago?

236
00:13:23,442 --> 00:13:24,042
Yes.

237
00:13:24,042 --> 00:13:25,282
What have you spent it on?

238
00:13:25,282 --> 00:13:26,322
J-cloths.

239
00:13:26,322 --> 00:13:27,442
J-cloths?

240
00:13:27,442 --> 00:13:29,042
All right, then.

241
00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:30,522
Nice suitcase.

242
00:13:30,522 --> 00:13:32,682
Yes. Jackson Pollock gave it to me

243
00:13:32,682 --> 00:13:35,802
and I borrowed this rucksack
from Rene Magritte.

244
00:13:35,802 --> 00:13:39,322
STEAM TRAIN WHISTLE

245
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:43,802
Yeah, I mean, it's a nice design,
but probably gets a bit annoying.

246
00:13:43,802 --> 00:13:45,082
No, it doesn't.

247
00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:51,642
Why haven't I got a rucksack?

248
00:13:52,802 --> 00:13:54,802
We're off to see the jelly fox.

249
00:13:54,802 --> 00:13:56,282
The jelly fox, the jelly fox.

250
00:13:56,282 --> 00:14:00,722
We're off to see the jelly fox,
who gives you what you need.

251
00:14:00,722 --> 00:14:04,282
We're off to see the jelly fox,
the jelly fox.

252
00:14:04,282 --> 00:14:06,522
Look at us, we're off to see
the jelly fox.

253
00:14:06,522 --> 00:14:09,202
It'll give us what we need.

254
00:14:09,202 --> 00:14:11,962
Me, little Chrissy.

255
00:14:11,962 --> 00:14:13,842
Him, Claw.

256
00:14:13,842 --> 00:14:15,322
(HUMS)

257
00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:17,162
Him, the Spoon Snake.

258
00:14:17,162 --> 00:14:19,922
Am I nothing?

259
00:14:19,922 --> 00:14:21,442
And him at the end,
McCoy.

260
00:14:21,442 --> 00:14:23,242
(CRUNCHES)

261
00:14:23,242 --> 00:14:25,642
Gotta go and see the jelly fox.

262
00:14:25,642 --> 00:14:27,442
He's a super being.

263
00:14:27,442 --> 00:14:29,602
He's a super magic man.

264
00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:31,242
He'll give you what you need.

265
00:14:31,242 --> 00:14:32,682
(HUMS)

266
00:14:32,682 --> 00:14:36,162
He lives in a blue fabric castle
with the red creases in it.

267
00:14:36,162 --> 00:14:38,002
THUNDER AND LIGHTING

268
00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:42,122
I saw him once, assuming
the shape of the rest in snooker.

269
00:14:42,122 --> 00:14:43,922
(CRUNCHES)

270
00:14:43,922 --> 00:14:45,882
I saw him in a Spanish canoe.

271
00:14:45,882 --> 00:14:47,242
(HUMS)

272
00:14:47,242 --> 00:14:50,442
He's got special powers
to give you what you need.

273
00:14:50,442 --> 00:14:52,242
He's going to give me a tablet

274
00:14:52,242 --> 00:14:56,882
that dissolves in wine
to wipe away my past.

275
00:14:56,882 --> 00:14:58,642
I've got to wipe away my past

276
00:14:58,642 --> 00:15:00,882
because I've killed
everyone in my village.

277
00:15:00,882 --> 00:15:02,242
(HUMS)

278
00:15:02,242 --> 00:15:05,362
I killed everyone in my village
with an Argos pen.

279
00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:08,082
Am I nothing?

280
00:15:08,082 --> 00:15:11,602
Spoon Snake's wife
wants a wet room.

281
00:15:11,602 --> 00:15:13,362
But I think Spoon Snake,

282
00:15:13,362 --> 00:15:17,522
he doesn't want to use his wish
from the jelly fox on a wet room.

283
00:15:17,522 --> 00:15:20,202
Am I nothing?

284
00:15:20,202 --> 00:15:24,522
He told me he wants to be
in a Mel Gibson vehicle.

285
00:15:24,522 --> 00:15:27,162
He wants to be in Apocalypto.

286
00:15:27,162 --> 00:15:29,922
I said to him,
"It's already been filmed,

287
00:15:29,922 --> 00:15:33,482
"you can't be an Apocalypto."
He says,

288
00:15:33,482 --> 00:15:39,242
"I can be in Apocalypto.
I can be in the new Apocalypto."

289
00:15:39,242 --> 00:15:43,042
I said, "There's no such
thing as the new Apocalypto."

290
00:15:43,042 --> 00:15:45,642
He said, "There is.

291
00:15:45,642 --> 00:15:47,482
"It's like Apocalypto...

292
00:15:49,042 --> 00:15:52,722
..but everyone's got
toothpaste on their eye."

293
00:15:52,722 --> 00:15:56,322
I said, I don't think that
Mel Gibson's agreed to that.

294
00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:58,122
(CRUNCHES)

295
00:15:58,122 --> 00:16:01,482
You are going to love this.

296
00:16:01,482 --> 00:16:02,922
Let me see.

297
00:16:03,962 --> 00:16:05,522
What's that supposed to be?

298
00:16:05,522 --> 00:16:06,482
A tiger!

299
00:16:06,482 --> 00:16:08,522
I asked for David Bowie.

300
00:16:08,522 --> 00:16:09,362
You look exactly like him.

301
00:16:09,362 --> 00:16:10,402
Really?

302
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:11,442
When he went through
his Tiger period?

303
00:16:11,442 --> 00:16:12,522
Yes.

304
00:16:12,522 --> 00:16:13,242
Just after Aladdin Sane?

305
00:16:13,242 --> 00:16:14,322
Yes.

306
00:16:14,322 --> 00:16:15,602
Don't mind me.

307
00:16:15,602 --> 00:16:16,802
All right, Frida.

308
00:16:16,802 --> 00:16:17,922
Hello, David.

309
00:16:19,002 --> 00:16:20,602
Who's that?

310
00:16:20,602 --> 00:16:22,122
Frida Kahlo, my new cleaner.

311
00:16:22,122 --> 00:16:23,882
It's clearly Andy.

312
00:16:23,882 --> 00:16:25,122
Andy?

313
00:16:25,122 --> 00:16:26,202
Yes?

314
00:16:26,202 --> 00:16:28,402
(No, you're not Andy!)

315
00:16:28,402 --> 00:16:29,762
Andy, what are you doing?

316
00:16:29,762 --> 00:16:31,162
I am not Andy Warhol,

317
00:16:31,162 --> 00:16:34,082
I am Frida Kahlo,
the Mexican surrealist.

318
00:16:34,082 --> 00:16:36,202
Andy Warhol has gone
on his holidays.

319
00:16:36,202 --> 00:16:39,082
Andy, it's totally cool
for you to wear a dress.

320
00:16:39,082 --> 00:16:40,962
We are all cool people, you know.

321
00:16:40,962 --> 00:16:44,282
Sometimes, I dress up as a cross
between a fireman and a baby,

322
00:16:44,282 --> 00:16:46,002
and I call myself a fire-baby.

323
00:16:46,002 --> 00:16:47,962
When did you do that, you sicko?

324
00:16:47,962 --> 00:16:50,202
I didn't know
you're a transvestite, Andy.

325
00:16:50,202 --> 00:16:51,922
I'm not transvestite!

326
00:16:51,922 --> 00:16:54,402
I'm Frida Kahlo,
the Mexican surrealist.

327
00:16:54,402 --> 00:16:56,882
Andy Warhol has gone
on his holidays.

328
00:16:56,882 --> 00:16:58,882
You gave him spending money,
remember?

329
00:16:58,882 --> 00:17:01,282
OK, don't go on about it already.

330
00:17:01,282 --> 00:17:02,642
I'm not going on about it!

331
00:17:02,642 --> 00:17:06,042
If you want to wear a dress in front
of the whole group, that's fine.

332
00:17:06,042 --> 00:17:08,002
It's so cool, Andy.

333
00:17:08,002 --> 00:17:10,002
I'm not Andy! I'm Frida Kahlo!

334
00:17:10,002 --> 00:17:13,002
Look, everyone stop talking now!

335
00:17:13,002 --> 00:17:15,282
Who's this hottie?

336
00:17:15,282 --> 00:17:18,802
Oh, you wouldn't believe it.
It's Frida Kahlo, covering for Andy Warhol

337
00:17:18,802 --> 00:17:20,162
while he's on his holidays.

338
00:17:20,162 --> 00:17:21,242
All right, Frida?

339
00:17:21,242 --> 00:17:24,002
I was thinking of hitting
Pizza Express. Want to join me?

340
00:17:24,002 --> 00:17:25,162
Yah. Yah, great.

341
00:17:25,162 --> 00:17:26,282
OK.

342
00:17:26,282 --> 00:17:27,402
Smooth!

343
00:17:27,402 --> 00:17:28,242
What are you doing?

344
00:17:28,242 --> 00:17:30,362
I've always had a thing
for Latino girls!

345
00:17:30,362 --> 00:17:32,922
Yeah, you know that's Andy Warhol,
don't you?

346
00:17:34,442 --> 00:17:35,682
Yeah.

347
00:17:38,562 --> 00:17:41,722
So, maybe sometimes you give me
some spending money?

348
00:17:41,722 --> 00:17:43,842
Don't think so.

349
00:17:43,842 --> 00:17:46,562
I don't give spending money
to fire-babies.

350
00:17:46,562 --> 00:17:48,362
It's not a joke, Noel.

351
00:17:48,362 --> 00:17:50,362
What do you do, anyway?

352
00:17:50,362 --> 00:17:52,882
Is it like a fireman's top half
and then a nappy?

353
00:17:52,882 --> 00:17:53,762
No.

354
00:17:53,762 --> 00:17:55,402
Is it a romper suit and helmet?

355
00:17:55,402 --> 00:17:56,602
Yes.

356
00:17:56,602 --> 00:17:57,722
Ridiculous.

357
00:17:57,722 --> 00:17:59,002
It's not ridiculous. It's a concept.

358
00:17:59,002 --> 00:18:01,042
It's quite ridiculous, like a joke.

359
00:18:01,042 --> 00:18:03,362
It's not a joke.
It's a serious concept.

360
00:18:03,362 --> 00:18:04,202
It's a joke.

361
00:18:04,202 --> 00:18:05,722
It's not. It's a concept.
It's insulting of you.

362
00:18:05,722 --> 00:18:06,762
It's a joke.

363
00:18:06,762 --> 00:18:07,402
It's a concept.

364
00:18:07,402 --> 00:18:07,882
It's a joke.

365
00:18:07,882 --> 00:18:08,362
It's a concept.

366
00:18:08,362 --> 00:18:09,482
I think it's a joke.

367
00:18:09,482 --> 00:18:11,042
Well, I know it's a concept.

368
00:18:11,042 --> 00:18:12,242
OK, let's consult Hawkeye.

369
00:18:12,242 --> 00:18:13,242
Fine.

370
00:18:18,122 --> 00:18:19,242
'Concept.'

371
00:18:19,242 --> 00:18:20,722
See, it's a concept.

372
00:18:20,722 --> 00:18:22,802
Ugh! Where are you going now?

373
00:18:22,802 --> 00:18:25,402
The station -
there's been a small emergency.

374
00:18:25,402 --> 00:18:27,362
FIREMAN'S BELL

375
00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:30,282
I'm coming.

376
00:18:31,562 --> 00:18:33,042
WHEELS SQUEAK

377
00:18:33,042 --> 00:18:35,242
It's not a concept, is it?

378
00:18:41,202 --> 00:18:43,882
I'm a bit puffed out, actually.

379
00:18:43,882 --> 00:18:48,882
I'm puffed out like in 1986,
when I went to Crete in a moccasin.

380
00:18:48,882 --> 00:18:51,082
I think we might need to have a
little rest.

381
00:18:51,082 --> 00:18:53,442
You can't really go and see
the jelly fox in one go.

382
00:18:53,442 --> 00:18:55,442
(HUMS)

383
00:18:55,442 --> 00:18:57,642
I think it's time to have a
little drinky.

384
00:18:57,642 --> 00:19:00,482
Get the straws out, McCoy.

385
00:19:02,282 --> 00:19:04,482
Get the straws out, McCoy.

386
00:19:06,322 --> 00:19:08,362
I love McCoy.

387
00:19:08,362 --> 00:19:11,122
But I'll crush him like a goose egg.

388
00:19:11,122 --> 00:19:13,122
(HUMS)

389
00:19:13,122 --> 00:19:16,482
He's got the straws all wrapped
up in a David Essex poster.

390
00:19:16,482 --> 00:19:19,322
Am I nothing?

391
00:19:19,322 --> 00:19:22,002
Look at Spoon Snake.

392
00:19:22,002 --> 00:19:24,242
He doesn't even know
what's going on.

393
00:19:25,842 --> 00:19:28,762
His face is like a green dish.

394
00:19:28,762 --> 00:19:31,562
Am I nothing?

395
00:19:31,562 --> 00:19:33,442
Let's all have some fizzy pop.

396
00:19:33,442 --> 00:19:36,802
Not you, McCoy, you've got diabetes.

397
00:19:36,802 --> 00:19:38,842
McCoy's got diabetes.

398
00:19:40,602 --> 00:19:44,522
We all laugh at that but it's not
a joke, it's a medical condition.

399
00:19:54,042 --> 00:19:56,562
Look at McCoy.

400
00:19:56,562 --> 00:19:58,082
He's so racist.

401
00:20:00,122 --> 00:20:01,162
THUNDER

402
00:20:01,162 --> 00:20:03,682
Oh! Look at John Travolta,

403
00:20:03,682 --> 00:20:06,282
standing in the window,
eating crisps.

404
00:20:07,482 --> 00:20:09,362
He's got a bumper pack.

405
00:20:09,362 --> 00:20:12,242
He's tucked them
into the front of his shorts.

406
00:20:12,242 --> 00:20:14,522
His cape goes on for ever.

407
00:20:14,522 --> 00:20:16,202
He's so Italian.

408
00:20:16,202 --> 00:20:19,802
There's Italian pollen coming
off his face

409
00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:21,482
and giving me hay fever.

410
00:20:21,482 --> 00:20:23,362
Right, come on,

411
00:20:23,362 --> 00:20:26,162
Spoon Snake, Claw, McCoy,

412
00:20:26,162 --> 00:20:27,762
we ain't got a moment to lose.

413
00:20:27,762 --> 00:20:30,122
Am I nothing?

414
00:20:30,122 --> 00:20:32,122
I'm going through
a terrible divorce.

415
00:20:33,642 --> 00:20:35,842
OK, it's a film.

416
00:20:35,842 --> 00:20:38,202
Three words. First word.

417
00:20:38,202 --> 00:20:40,202
Pinching Slimbar!

418
00:20:40,202 --> 00:20:41,242
What?

419
00:20:41,242 --> 00:20:42,802
Pinching Slimbar!

420
00:20:42,802 --> 00:20:44,482
That's not even a word.

421
00:20:44,482 --> 00:20:46,362
Pinching Slimbar.

422
00:20:51,442 --> 00:20:55,442
Oh, I know it,
it's the Kevin Bacon one.

423
00:20:55,442 --> 00:20:58,242
You know, the one where he plays the
paedophile. Oh, what's it called?

424
00:20:58,242 --> 00:21:00,322
Um... Pinching Slimbar.

425
00:21:00,322 --> 00:21:01,762
Pinching Slimbar.

426
00:21:01,762 --> 00:21:05,602
Good vehicle for Bacon, that was.
Really brought him back after Footloose.

427
00:21:05,602 --> 00:21:07,762
Pinching Slimbar.

428
00:21:09,882 --> 00:21:12,402
THUNDER

429
00:21:12,402 --> 00:21:14,162
Almost there.

430
00:21:14,162 --> 00:21:16,442
Spoon Snake, phone your wife.

431
00:21:18,362 --> 00:21:20,722
Tell her you'll probably never
see her again.

432
00:21:20,722 --> 00:21:22,562
We're entering the dark zone.

433
00:21:24,882 --> 00:21:27,162
We're literally on the jelly fox's
doorstep.

434
00:21:27,162 --> 00:21:29,282
We're all going to get what we need.

435
00:21:31,082 --> 00:21:35,202
Claw, please,
slip on the knocking glove

436
00:21:35,202 --> 00:21:38,562
and let loose
with your porcelain digits.

437
00:21:38,562 --> 00:21:39,962
(HUMS)

438
00:21:39,962 --> 00:21:43,962
We don't want to upset him
by scratching the new mahogany.

439
00:21:43,962 --> 00:21:46,042
Knock on his door.

440
00:21:46,042 --> 00:21:48,002
KNOCKS ON DOOR

441
00:21:48,002 --> 00:21:50,402
Oh!

442
00:21:50,402 --> 00:21:52,402
Everyone hold hands,

443
00:21:52,402 --> 00:21:55,122
I can hear him
coming down the stairs.

444
00:21:56,682 --> 00:22:00,802
I can hear his booming
voice as he gets closer.

445
00:22:05,802 --> 00:22:07,762
GROANING

446
00:22:07,762 --> 00:22:09,722
(SCREAMING)

447
00:22:09,722 --> 00:22:11,282
GROANING

448
00:22:11,282 --> 00:22:13,082
(SCREAMING)

449
00:22:13,082 --> 00:22:14,642
GROANING

450
00:22:14,642 --> 00:22:16,082
(PANTING)

451
00:22:16,082 --> 00:22:17,362
GROANING

452
00:22:17,362 --> 00:22:18,642
(SCREAMING)

453
00:22:18,642 --> 00:22:19,802
GROANING

454
00:22:19,802 --> 00:22:22,242
(SCREAMING)

455
00:22:27,522 --> 00:22:30,082
What are you lot doing here?

456
00:22:30,082 --> 00:22:33,162
Oh, my God,
he's got like a whole little world.

457
00:22:33,162 --> 00:22:35,682
You're not supposed to be back
until 11:30!

458
00:22:35,682 --> 00:22:38,962
Ah, look, there's John Travolta
at the window, eating crisps.

459
00:22:38,962 --> 00:22:41,402
Yeah, he's at the window
and he's eating crisps.

460
00:22:41,402 --> 00:22:43,562
Great. Can you get out now, please?

461
00:22:45,002 --> 00:22:47,042
We can still see you, Noel.

462
00:22:47,042 --> 00:22:48,922
You know there's no coming
back from this?

463
00:22:48,922 --> 00:22:50,522
Yeah. I'm fully aware of that.

464
00:22:50,522 --> 00:22:52,402
Now, it'd be great if you could all
go.

465
00:22:54,682 --> 00:22:57,322
So, Noel,
is this a joke or a concept?

466
00:23:01,602 --> 00:23:03,722
It's a concept.

467
00:23:03,772 --> 00:23:08,322
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